Reminiscing: Our Struggle

Posted on March 28, 2011


I just came across this old blog (i forgot i even had a blogspot) and reading it made me feel sort of crazy inside.  Realistically it brought me back to how i felt then, which was really fucking crazy inside (as the blog captures well… and it should, it was pure streaming consciousness). I haven’t really felt what we went through last April.  This part realllyyy stuck out:

The people I work with day in and day out are literally building a positive movement. We are manifesting relationships not based on domination/subordination or us vs. them mentalities but rather co-intentional learning experiences, respect, and understanding through what feels like sheer will alone. I respect that every person is going through their own struggles, their own life paths, learning their own lessons. And those life experiences create a standpoint from which one views the world. Which is why i don’t take our opinion as normative. I don’t take my views of the world as unbiased. Or right for everyone in all situations. I just know they make sense for me in relation to my experiences and my life. My point is that we are building, manifesting, creating. And it is hard fucking work…One reason I have a heavy heart right now because I feel like what I am working for is being misunderstood. Or passed over. Like, people aren’t even taking the time to try and understand what it’s all about. I know it’s easier to keep your head down, focus on school, your job, your relationship, just get to the weekend and play some pong and have a good time with your friends. I’ve been there. I’ve thought that was what college is about. That CAN be what it is about. But then what changes? If anything is static there is a problem. Things should always be in flux. If we, the youth, aren’t looking critically at the world around us we are just going to buy in to it. And look at what’s happening around us. Everyone is miserable, jobs are being lost, we all know the story. All of this is happening because of our current infrastructures and the way we do business as usual. even normal things in daily life. It is all connected. I REFUSE to buy in to this. Instead I work my ass off to change what tiny, minute portion of it I can. Because if you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem. People can be part of the solutions in varying degrees, but always keep in mind that in whatever ways you AREN’T challenging or questioning or critiquing you could be perpetuating a detrimental cycle. and that takes a lot of focus and dedication. and THAT is a lot of fucking work too. This is a call to action people need to hear, while the callers also understand that everyone has lessons to be learned in this life and not everyone’s path is that

I feel like that again, and it feels right.  I live for this.

Bri and I were just talking about this the other day… I cannot believe it’s been a year since then.  Crazy.  more thoughts to come later.